Oh Yuck.

Being all Fathers-Dayey at our house yesterday I decided to make the love of my life a leg of lamb. I had it roasting nicely in the oven, the yummy smells wafting around the house, my huggy bear ensconced on the couch doing Dad things (scratching and burping) and my children hither and yon. It was a good day. Then I noticed someone needed to take the trash out. Hmmmmmm I know! I'll take it out since it Fathers Day and my hubby should rest and keep doing the dad things. (note of truth here: the hubby never takes the trash out as his motto is why do that when there are three people running around here eating his food for free and since they are the fruit of his loins they can darn well take out the trash and do other character building things....like mowing the lawn...and dishes!)

Back to my story. As I was walking out back to take that trash to the can I was happily humming the new song from church. The birds were singing. There was a gentle breeze. Jane Eyre was busily writing a new story of how perfect my life was at just that moment. Then?? Life stopped being so perfect. Just as I was lifting up the lid I saw something go plop out of the trash can. Things started going in slow motion after that. I turned my head to get a closer look and realized something was not quite right. Were those?? Could those be?? Noooooooooooooooo
Maggots. From all the rain we've had around here and the flies that have come out in droves I had maggots in mah trash can. Now people, we have talked about my little ocd-ish issues. You know that pine sol is my friend. I have "Cleanliness is next to Godliness" engraved on my heart. There is no room in my life for fly-babies.
I ran in the house to get the aforementioned hubby enjoying his Fathers Day on the couch to help me HELP ME I SAY!!! He comes outside after finding gloves and heavy shoes cause God knows that the (m-word) things will leap across the yard and get on him. Then he tells me that he will pour bleach on them. BLEACH!!!! I am trying to cultivate a bird paradise out there and he wants to get all happy with the bleach. A very loving talk ensues between two grown ups. One of those grown ups grabs the hose and starts spraying everything down that is even thinking about having a (m-word) on it. Hubby decided to go to the store and buy vinegar cause I guess vinegar will kill them. Wanna know something?? It doesn't.
After an hour of spraying the can down and getting them off of my sidewalk (and onto someone else's) I had a ton of happy robins eating away. Much chirping between them about how this was the best yard ever!
I then went into the house and took a long hot shower. And ate lamb. And told the son he had to make sure the trash went to the curb for the trash man...I may or may not have omitted the whole infestation problem-o we'd had earlier. :) Then I took another shower. Then I prayed that the flies and I had come to an understanding and they will be raising their babies elsewhere from now on.
heh.
Happy Fathers Day everyone!!!

Update: I just went to check the trash can and make sure all was well with my world. They are back. Not as many as before but there are at least 5 in there.
We may have to move.