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Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Serial Killer At My Door.....

Oh Int-Netz!!! You are not gonna believe what I did today!! Oh the horror!!! Oh the craziness!!! Oh if Oprah could have seen!!!!



I had just woken up from a very satisfying nap. One which I had to take cause I talked to the doctor about my "Vitamins" and yeah, that makes me very exhausted feeling in my brain so after a two hour trip to Barnes and Noble a nap was next up. So there I was. Just woke up from a nap. Feeling a little hungry so I went to the kitchen for a biscotti (lemon) when it happened. I heard a knock at the door. Duh Duh Duh!!! I peeked out of our side window to see who it could be and I saw an old truck with two ladders on the side and some other men type things. I went to the door to peek out the window and a little old man was standing there holding out a name badge. I opened the door very carefully and he gave me this big smile. I know!!! He had serial killer written all over him!!!! He told me he was from Time Warner Cable and that he was making house calls to check on the work of the phone installer that had come to the house a couple of weeks ago. He said some of them were not installing phones right and he needed to see if there was some box attached. Now this whole time I am standing there not saying a word and wondering if my num-chuck skills are going to be needed. He again shows me his badge and tells me it's okay and then smiles again.



Int-netz.....I let him in.



I know!! I can hear you yelling "oh no Dawn you didnt!!!"



I did. I was caught unawares and not fully awake and OMG if Oprah was here she would have my head as she has done any number of shows on just this type of thing!! I swear if he would have asked me to help him find his puppy I would have gone. And all because he smiled at me and said it was okay......and he kinda looked like a grandpa.

I totally re-thought my decision when I was watching him crawl around on my floor checking our phone line and even wondered what I would do if he whipped out his screw-driver and came after me. It was then I started to get really worried. So as he's crawling around I tell him all nonchalantly "my husband is home but he is upstairs." "Upstairs very close and probably listening right this very minute" annnnnnnnnnnnd just in case he wasn't as concerned as he should be I through in...... "he is a body builder." and I may have said "Please do not kill me cause I have a Nook coming soon from Barnes and Noble and I will really be bummed if I die before I can use it."

Thankfully he was not a killer of unsuspecting women who have just woken up from a nap. I am, however, on restriction from opening up the door during the day so if anyone comes by and I do not answer this is why. Plus ....just a little FYI to any future phone checkers that come a knockin.......today I bought 6 very large German Sheppard type dogs. And maybe a Pit Bull. Possibly the rabid dog from Cujo.

Just saying.

7 comments:

Stephanie D said...

Um, so was there really a phone installer there two weeks ago?

And if there was, did he look like this guy in disguise or not?

I think you need a Doberman. Just to round out the lot.

Kelly Ann said...

I'm thinking that any decisions during the day can not be made directly after a nap...

Lauren The Artist said...

Thank goodness you survived to tell the tale. Could you have fought back by beating him with the biscotti???

mascanlon said...

I was sure you were going to refuse to let him in and then tell us they got arrested down the street! Hmmm...most of the time naps during the day are a good thing but not when you're home alone for sure. (hey doesn't that sound like there's a movie in that?)

Leigh said...

Oh man! Never a dull moment at the Owens House! I agree with Jen, you probably could have taken him with your biscotti!

Jodi said...

I do that all the time. Although in this little dinky town I know most of the people that come to my door.

I am glad he was not a serial killer. We would have missed you. :D

quiltmamajb said...

Hilarious account! Now you have lots of food shopping to do to feed that body-building husband and that passle of dogs! It's always somethin', isn't it? Good thing you had that biscotti to keep you going!